Wow . . . what a summer; I can’t remember a summer when the time has sped by as quickly as it has this year. Thankfully Char and I were able to break away for a weekend in Door County last weekend. At the end of this month and a good deal of September I hit the road again for a series of stops throughout the Midwest and Texas. Oh well, its warm and the sun is out, its all good.
I happened across a great blog today that has an excellent post about safe and unsafe people. I think this will resonate with everyone who reads this blog. I certainly have become far more keenly aware of people that I consider safe as opposed to unsafe. I am much more careful these days about who I “let in” compared to those that I am willing to hang-out with. The same is probably true for you. Here is the abbreviated post, if you would like to read the entire piece please go to Kathy Escobar’s blog.
unsafe people (and communities):
- think they ”have it all together” instead of admitting their weaknesses
- are defensive instead of open to feedback
- are self-righteous instead of humble
- only apologize instead of changing their behavior
- avoid working on their problems instead of dealing with them
- demand trust instead of earning it
- blame others instead of take responsibility
- lie instead of tell the truth
- remain stagnant instead of growing
- resist freedom instead of encouraging it (can’t take no for an answer)
- flatter us instead of confronting us
- condemn us instead of forgiving us
- stay in parent/child roles instead of relating to us as equals
- unstable over time instead of being consistent
- gossip instead of keeping secrets
ouch. some of these are pretty brutal & even though i consider myself a fairly safe person i cringed at a few, knowing that i do & think these things more than i wished.
safe people (and communities):
- accept us just like we are
- love us no matter how we are being or what we do
- influence us to develop our ability to love and be responsible
- create love and good works within us
- give us an opportunity to grow & stretch & practice
- help us feel comfortable being “ourselves”, to be on the outside what we are on the inside
- allow us to become the us that God intended
- use their lives to touch ours and leave us better for it
- help us be more like Christ
- help us to like & love others more
- make the relationship more important than opinions
- receive instead of just give
- are humble & willing to say what they need
- are honest, kind & don’t pretend
- work through resistances instead of giving up
